It appears the usual Christmas shows have been edited this year to coincide with the end of the world, now only 2 weeks away. Ratings are expected to skyrocket unless you have destroyed your TV in a fit of panic. On the schedule this year :
Santa’s not coming to town due to the Poles Shifting – North Pole becomes South Pole in this madcap adventure. The highlight of the show is Santa’s solo at the end “You better not shout, you better not cry, you better not pout I’m telling you why, the Earth’s poles have shifted and we’re all going to die !!
Frosty the Planet – A quick little show set in a small town where the citizens make snowmen just as the sun explodes, plummeting the Planet into an instant ice cube. Not much singing in this one !
The Mayans that stole Christmas – Cindy Lou Who gets screwed in this semi dark story of the season as the Christmas roast beast get ruined right before the big day. Whoville is pissed as they gather to say, couldn’t you kill us off before a different holiday ?
A Charlie Brown Fallout Shelter – The Peanuts gang forgoes the annual Christmas play to gather in subterranean caves, learning to forage for food, and discover the magic of killing with your bare hands. Pretty much like any episode of Doomsday Preppers, only with little kids and a cheery Christmas theme.
And finally, the highlight of all in Rudolph the red assed Reindeer. Guaranteed to bring tears to your eyes as Rudy realizes his red nose spreads to other areas. In this version Hermie takes on the role of proctologist and saves the day with Yukon Cornelius’ pick axe. Don’t ask…..Ok, this has nothing to do with the end of the world but I laughed my ass off when I thought of it….
Enjoy the shows, they may be your last !!